Monday, September 6, 2010

The Best of Intentions

I continue to amaze myself. I am amazed that despite the best of intentions, I am continuously falling short of what I'd like to do. You'd think I'm human or something? My Super Mom clothes seem to be losing their effect!

Today marks the end of summer. Ah, I had such great plans for this summer! I had dreams of field trips, educational opportunities, play dates and cooking parties with my daughter and her friends. I intended to review Leeann's kindergarten lessons with her frequently so she could retain what she learned last year. In fact at the beginning of the summer I put a stack of homework pages... um... somewhere... I think... for just this purpose. Now I find myself incredibly curious as to where I might have placed those.

I had dreams of getting my house and my life in order. Remember those routines I started working on last Spring? I'm happy to report that at least the laundry part stuck. But, let's be honest, that's just about it!

I intended to train for a 5k. I didn't run once. Mind you, I did complete the biking leg of a sprint-triathlon (12.5 miles), but it was far from what I set out to do.

So basically, I feel like I let another season slip by. It's not like I didn't accomplish anything this summer. I just didn't accomplish what I set out for. Or at least not as much as I'd hoped. Sometimes I feel like this is the story of my life.

I wonder what it feels like to be a disciplined woman? I wonder how much more I could accomplish if I were disciplined? I struggle between feeling like I ought to be disciplined, or simply embracing the chaotic, undisciplined woman God made me to be. I guess the question is, did God make me to be that way? Yes, perhaps that is the question.

Keeping it Real...


Jennifer & DW said...

I feel ya' girl!!!

Anonymous said...

God calls us all to discipline, I believe. B-U-T...He also knows our starting point. I don't think the point is for us all to look exactly the same. I think the point is that we are always growing and improving, with the Grace given us by our Heavenly Father. You say the laundry stuck? GREAT! Now, take on ONE other change and work towards that! You can do it :)